frokamen

It's been a rough eleven days since my birthday, hell its been rough since the beginning of November when my car was broken and how that's been unfolding to this month with my birthday a week later my Aunt passing away and someone trying to take advantage of the situation to create drama in a part of my personal life. But you guys stepped in this time and I'm grateful for that. Thank you everyone for the avalanche of support and attention that the two latest additions to my gallery have been receiving since I started posting them last night and this morning. It really means a lot to me as a content prov....poster here on DArt. I also want to thank my brother and the artist Johnnyharadrim for being so supportive of me during this rough time. The encourage and support helped me get through this difficult point. I've told multiple people that I have enough difficulty acting my age so I especially have no idea how to behave my current age but with the help and support of those around I think I will be able to get through this year and start to get a hang of this next stage of being an adult. Thank you again everyone truly bless you all.

Had a player inform me this evening near the end of the session inform me that it was creepiest campaign they had ever been in. Considering this came before how they reacted to that final villain/party interaction I will take it that they meant scary rather cancel-able. I like to think that particular party matured a little today even with the shortened play time do to golf tournament.

Finished the first campaign I ever started as a DM last night... making it the second campaign I've finished as a DM. There was a couple of upsetting moments true, but at the end of the day the players that stuck around had their moments. One player pouted after his "moment" back fired and then he left the gathering and went to bed. But otherwise they got through it. One player failed a check against fear, the wizard and spent the rest of the fight fleeing, but the other two held the line and "won" even though they both died well in the case of the paladin he died twice in one round...but well shit happens. I like to think they had a fun time they had one question afterwards because it was getting close to midnight and I answered it and I hope it was satisfying. Now to start think about the next one, my fifth, and how to recruit more players for it.

I've been doing some thinking since late Thursday night very early Friday morning. One of the reasons I haven't been posting here was because I was self conscious regarding the response it would get whether it be art or writing elsewhere, primarily 4chan but I digress, but after a conversation I had here on DArt its sunk in its the internet and whether I'm aware of it or not what's in my gallery here will end up somewhere else already and eventually even more places. The frustrating part being I will be ignorant of that happening and remain so often until the artwork triggers a response and then I'm informed by someone hoping that I can provide resolution. I had the experience of trying to process this situation while at time becoming depressed, feeling attacked and judged just because someone posted artwork from my gallery somewhere and even though it wasn't the intent of the person informing me of this and seeking my help in the matter, I started to feel at fault for the situation and that isn't right either. I will never know everywhere the art here ends up and I will never be able to always defend it like I would like to or feel I should be able to and this as immature, juvenile, and internet culture ignorant as this may sound it pains me a bit to accept and realize that. Its a lot easier to handle and accept when there's a willful ignorance to it, yes its happening somewhere but I have no idea where and no way of knowing, its something else when your informed of specific examples of it happening and location and at times expected to fix or resolve the situation one way or another as well. It made me feel old honestly lol.

But that's the thing I can't hide it and I have no intention of doing so I posted the artwork here because I wanted it to be seen and shared and it has been even though at times its in ways I didn't expect or was aware of. If that's going to be the case then there's no point in keeping fresh content from ending up here since its already happening an increase in content won't impact that. It's time eventually for them to have new things to discuss and parade around.

Not making any concrete promises regarding pulling it off, I was intending to do some writing over the weekend but that didn't work out and I'm still salty regarding how Rounds 8 and 6 in Shuumatsu and Majo Taisen turned out but with my Sunday game likely cancelled again and my biweekly Wednesday game in its last two sessions I may be able to scrape together some spare creativity enough at least to make the attempt. I can't always just sit around and be bummed about my favorite writers not creating content when I haven't done anything even for my personal archive of significance in years. My brother is likely disappointed but still remains supportive bless him. But yeah who knows it just depends upon how the week goes.